Embrace Your Inner Geek: A Secret To Success

What I have come to hold as a central tenet in my work is this: Each of us has a spectacular and singular constellation of skills and strengths, experiences and quirks that makes us just a little different from the rest of the crowd.

In some way we all have a geek inside us. The precocious – and precious – part of ourselves that we allow out only when we’re feeling safe or we slip into “unedited” mode.

And I also understand how easy it is to get sucked into a sense of awkwardness and deep uncertainty – even when you are a full-grown, fully functioning and successful adult:

  • You don’t feel capable of putting the best of who you are and what you do out into the world.
  • You feel wrong because you’re “different” when you are your amazing, unedited self.
  • You begin to think you’ll never get beyond where you are because there is always someone who is better than you.
  • You feel inadequate and unprepared, so you keep working on that perpetual “just one more thing” that is going to make you feel sure and secure.
  • You feel like you don’t belong.
  • You don’t fit in.
  • You will never be understood and fully accepted.

The Answer: Embrace the Geekdom

Embracing the geekdom is you not letting someone dim your light just because it’s shining in their eyes.

When we embrace our geekdom we stop struggling against what is not changeable and we stop trying to be someone we are not.

We find there is more we can do and that we can do it with less effort.

We are not constantly in a mad dash trying to get through a to-do list.

We develop a greater sense of mastery over our talents. We can let go of tasks better done by others and put our talents to work on what we are best suited to do.

We can nurture what we want to develop more of and mold what we do have to its fullest expression, without apology.

We can utter a positive no when we need and a delighted yes when we desire.

We create an environment that marries your technical and academic know how with our authentic core self, so you can fashion a life that envelops other priorities, like family, friends and creative pursuits.

In short we learn to master the art of making a life while making a living and that benefits everyone we come into contact with.

And that’s what InMotion Consulting and Coaching is about – going from chaos to calm, mastering life while making a living, embracing the geekdom.

Now let’s talk about you.

What would your life look like if you just embraced your geekdom?

If you’re interested in going deeper, call me for a free, no-strings-attached 30-minute consultation. Schedule yours now!

All rights reserved@2013

Deirdre Danahar works with busy, creative, professionals who are looking to shift from what feels chaotic, disjointed or frustrating to a calm productive, spirited life.  People she works with come away knowing how to do their best work without sacrificing their quality of life. She is the owner of InMotion Consulting & Coaching, LLC, based in Jackson, MS. Reach her at deirdre@inmotioncc.com or 601-362-8288.

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Geek vs. Nerd: Which are You?

Me I am clearly a geek but with some nerd tendencies.*

Why should you care if you are geek or need? No reason other than our sense about “geek” and  “nerd” might be changing. And for the better.

These days it is entirely permissible to “geek out” over something that you understand really know and care about. . . cats, cars, cooking, football, or futbol, the decline of grammar, the influence of the blues on contemporary classical guitar in Spain, home-schooling, ballroom dance. . . For most people there is something you could geek over if you wanted to, but only if you want to.

I hear this shift in the conversations I have with my family, friends, colleagues and clients. One of my friends summed up this emerging shift beautifully:

“We just might be moving into a mind-space where geeks are simply considered interesting, engaging, quirky, super-smart folks who do something extraordinarily well. And are appreciated.”~ Adel Brown

Who does not want to be a valued for what you do well, especially when you are unvarnished?

Claiming your genuine self with all its facets is a wonderful, exciting and dare I say liberating choice.

Before I “embraced my geedom” I always had too many balls up in the air, whether it was completing graduate school while working part-time, working multiple jobs after I got my master’s degrees or being the overly loyal friend trying to fit into things that were not mine to fit into.  And that I did not have time for anyway.

The word no seemed to be missing from my vocabulary: I was always available and avoided disappointing anyone.

Embracing  my geekdom meant figuring out what I would say yes to and what I would say no to. What I would think about and how I would let those thoughts influence my actions.

It meant editing my life to focus on what I am best at, what I adore, and making the sometimes hard choices to do the editing and then owning those decisions and consequences.

Consequences like letting go of some relationships that just did not fit any longer so that new ones that did could take root. It meant learning to do new things.  It was a change. Change is always weird and hard, even when you want the change.

Now I know it is possible to be independent and still be compassionately connected to who and what I love, even if the way I am connected changes in some unexpected way.

Whether you identify of a geek nerd or neither, I hope you revel in what you do well, what you love, and the special twist you bring to the world when you are your unvarnished, unguarded self.

Be unabashedly you. Brazen. Forward. Forthright. Unashamed. You. I double dog dare you to unleash your wonderful Inner Geek.

So if you want to know if you are a geek or nerd or some combination of both, look no further than this infographic.*

Geeks vs Nerds
From: MastersInIt.org

All rights reserved@2013

Deirdre Danahar works with busy, creative, professionals who are looking to shift from what feels chaotic, disjointed or frustrating to a calm productive, spirited life.  People she works with come away knowing how to do their best work without sacrificing their quality of life. She is the owner of InMotion Consulting & Coaching, LLC, based in Jackson, MS. Reach her at deirdre@inmotioncc.com or 601-362-8288.

It Takes Guts to Live, Love and Work Wholeheartedly

To live wholeheartedly is, to actively and sincerely devote yourself to living from a place of value, as part of community, a family, a relationship of any sort, even if it means risking great pain. It takes guts. It is as if, regardless of circumstances, you are truly, madly, deeply in love with the world and yourself. It means you show up in your life, in your work, fully. Sounds romantic, and it is, and like most romance it requires some elements to make it work.

Chiefly related to being wholehearted is your capacity to love and to be loved. This does not mean only romantic love, but can too be a love of humanity, a love of friends and family. This capacity to give and receive love is measured by the degree to which you value relationships with others marked by sustained deep feelings that provide happiness and foster healthy, respectful growth. As well as, how consistently you cultivate these relationships as a two-way venture. This capacity is a strength we each have to varying degrees and that can be fostered over time (M. Seligman, Authentic Happiness, 2002). If you can be loving and be loved you have a superb starting place to live wholeheartedly.

Wholeheartedness is a committed enthusiastic sustained series of choices and actions that unfold over time.  It is emotional, adventurous, mysterious and easily idealized. And it is worth the courage and effort it requires.

Being wholehearted you choose to let go of what is familiar and show up in your life. You just show up in life, you don’t run away and you don’t grandstand, and you don’t judge when you show up. You screw up your courage and show up. Showing up can be as noble as sitting quietly with a loved one who is gravely ill.  It can also be as simple as dancing as if no one is watching on a Tuesday afternoon in the yard with your kid.  It means taking a breath, collecting your thoughts and actually listening to the meaning behind an other person’s words.  It means doing (or trying to do) more set of reps at the gym than you believe you can.  It means being willing to tolerate the ambiguity that comes from trying something new.

Brene Brown, a leading scholar of wholeheartedness, notes people are wholehearted live and love as they are, in the circumstances they are in, even awful circumstances, without losing zest for life or self worth. They take the time to rest, practice gratitude, and to play. They own up to what freaks them out or mistakes made, so that shame does not take root.

Wholeheartedly Showing Up

Can you show up without judgment in your life and others?

When you do what happens? In my experience there is a greater sense of ease that allows you to find you way through a messy, tricky situation. It is easier to learn from mistakes, something generally easier said than done. Taking risk in the future is also more likely which is great because moving beyond the familiar is where growth happened. Where you get to keep building and stretching your strengths. It is where you get better and can find that fine and ever-changing line between complacency and contentment.

Nothing ventured nothing gained, could almost be the tag line for being wholehearted. When you believe in your own merit- to know within yourself that you have potential, whether that potential has been expressed or not-  it is easier to take a step into the unknown. Stepping into the unknown makes you simultaneously vulnerable and courageous enough to live and love wholeheartedly.

Approach Your Work and Life Wholeheartedly

What might you be able to do with greater ease because you know there is some breathing room built-in to your approach?

Could you more easily engage with staff or colleagues in a way they need so you can lead them but that you have been avoiding?

Would you be willing to take on a precious project that you have been waiting until the magical “perfect time” arrives?

Would quieting the yammering of your inner critic be easier?

Would you be willing to confront the “pink elephant” in the room in order to get past it?

Would you be able to more fully mentor someone who could really benefit from your wisdom?

Would you just feel better? Happier? Be more likely to smile like a Cheshire cat at the end of the day?

All rights reserved@2013

Deirdre Danahar works with busy, creative, professionals who are looking to shift from what feels chaotic, disjointed or frustrating to a calm productive, spirited life.  People she works with come away knowing how to do their best work without sacrificing their quality of life. She is the owner of InMotion Consulting & Coaching, LLC, based in Jackson, MS. Reach her at deirdre@inmotioncc.com or 601-362-8288.